"Procrastination ..."

Honestly, I've never been a big procrastinator (ok, the odd task gets pushed to the back burner) but this is really bad! It's been six weeks since I last "blogged" - even I didn't realize it had been soooo long. The good news is nobody has emailed asking me if my delinquency means something is wrong. The great news is Dane is doing excellent and with all of life's business, I just haven't sat down to type.

The news ...

Dane started another cycle in early February and his treatment was another milestone in his journey. He was scheduled for two appts that week - his regular monthly check-up on Tuesday and his every three month spinal tap on Wednesday. The problem ... he had a track meet on the Wed and he qualified for several events - even one in an older grade - and there wasn't a hope he was missing out. The appt couldn't be rescheduled but he could have the spinal done in the Clinic on the Tuesday, however with no sedation (a first). He thought about it - but really not for that long - and declared "I will NOT miss the track meet so I'll do the spinal without being put to sleep." There was no changing his mind and although I was nervous (so was he a bit), we proceeded and it went off without a hitch. He lay there so still, the small area on his back frozen and the doctor did her thing. He never moved and afterward said he didn't feel much at all, especially no pain. It was great and now there is likely no turning back. It seemed to make his recovery time shorter because he didn't have to contend with the effects of the sedation. That kid is one tough bugger!!!

An indication of how far I am behind with my writing is we go back to clinic this coming Tuesday for his next monthly checkup. The timing is good as he has no games during the week so he should be well rested by the next weekend for playoffs. It's also steroid time again so we've got that to look forward to - NOT! That said, the past couple of months have definitely been better and we are all thankful that's the case. It's hard to believe we've been at this for over two years. Some days we are both "fed up to here" with leukemia, pills and Dane's fatigue but what can we do? We walk a fine line with him still because when he doesn't show much energy or interest we don't know if it's the meds or Dane just being Dane. We look forward to the day when we know it's just his attitude because at least it will be obvious.

Tons of hockey & ringette still being played. Dane's team just finished the regular season and a tourney - they played 7 games last week and Dane held his own. They start playoffs tomorrow night and then get a week's reprieve. Ashley's playoff journey began today on a winning note and they are back at it this Monday night. After playoffs it's one final year end tourney for both and then we are done for a week or so before spring season starts!

We are heading out on a family ski trip to Montana in March and are very excited! We have not skied since 2008, the spring before Dane got sick and little Ms. Clare arrived. We are heading to Big Sky - a hill I grew up at but haven't been too in about 25 years. Should be lots of fun.

Clare is great! She is nearly 22 months old, getting tall and talking a lot. And not to jinx it but FINALLY sleeping better. We moved her into a bed about a month ago and after a hard transition, she seems to love it and most nights she sleeps through. You can't even imagine how wonderful it is not to feel sleep deprived most of the time - that goes for both Dirk & I. It's amazing how you function so much better with some decent shut-eye!

Well, I've crammed a lot into this blog because I'm mindful it might be a bit until I "post" again. I'll have to put a big, bright sticky note on my face to remind myself! Until next time, take care and hope life is good for all.

Janie & Dirk

"24 down, 16 to go"

Two years ago this week. Life turned upside down. Three and a half years of treatment ahead of us. Such a long, long road. How will we survive the journey that accompanies childhood cancer?

Fast forward to January 2011. Consider ourselves in the "home stretch". 24 months behind us ... 16 more to go. With the start of another calendar year, May 2012 doesn't seem so far away. Oncologist echoes this milestone is good news. Dane continues to stare leukemia in the face and win! Please continue to believe in miracles and no relapses.

Life as of late ...

Enjoyed a nice holiday season with the kids, family and friends. Whipped down to Minni for a few days to watch a Sharks v. Wild NHL game. Dane's hero "Big Joe" was on the losing end but his new and good friend Cam Barker was a wonderful host and victorious. Great shopping and minus getting stuck in Fargo for an extra night because of a crazy blizzard and brutal driving conditions, it was a good trip.

Hockey & ringette are in full swing again. Both kids' teams continue to do pretty well. Ashley's team is 8-1-1 but need to pick it up a bit b/c other teams are really catching up. Dane's 9A1 gang had a great first half finishing near the top of the leader board. Between regular season, tourneys and playoffs, the next three months will be hectic.

Clare is 20 months old. Talking up a storm and really a little character. We love her to bits but really need the "sleep doctor" to pay a visit to our place. She continues to keep us up many nights and this is tough on two working parents.

Medical news ...

Dane had his monthly IV chemo this past Tuesday. All was good. Neutrophils still high enough to stay at 100% chemo dosages. Steroids finished yesterday - yeah! A much better cycle though, really no mood issues which is a welcome relief. He has lots of zip and it showed in his skating this weekend. That's always uplifting.

Hope all is good in your world. Thanks for staying tuned into our ongoing journey.

Janie & Dirk

"Here comes Santa Claus ..."

Two days to go until the big guy in the red suit arrives to delight all of our children. Ashley and Dane are still believers - or at least that's what they tell us! They are getting very excited and it's wonderful they are all so healthy at this special and busy time of the year.

We will post a new update after X-mas ... time is running out and there are still many things to do before the big day. From our family to yours, best wishes for a magical holiday season.

Warmly - The Hantschers

ps Enjoy the 2010 X-mas photo!

"Busy ... Busy"

So, yet another headline to "excuse" my blog writing delay. Life is truly very busy these days ... such is fall when you have kids playing winter sports. A quick recap of the past month and some cute pics as well ...

Start of another cycle

Dane had his monthly chemo treatment and every three month spinal tap procedure last week. The good news is his neutrophil count rebounded from October so we remain at 100% chemo dosages and don't have to go back to clinic until early December. The bad news is the past five days have been "steroids" and you all know by now that is our least favorite time of the month. He did pretty well this go around ... a couple of down days in the middle but today he seems more like his normal self. We are on the countdown of spinals ... I think he only has six left until he finishes this gig once and for all in May 2012!

Early champions

Both kids were entered in pre-season tourneys and just to be sure neither was outdone, each of their teams won the gold medals/championships. Ashley's team is off to a wonderful start - they are 7-0 and really having a great time. She's skating fantastic and playing solid "d". Dane's team is 8-2 and bonding like crazy. In between many ice times they are finding time for lots of fun activities ... swimming parties, street hockey pancake breakfasts and Moose games. All in all - the season is off to a super start.

18 months

It's hard to believe but our "little" Clare is already 18 months old! She is soooo much fun and in our biased opinions absolutely adorable. She has really found her voice - the talking is taking shape and to our dismay, she has screaming down to a science. Not much of a surprise - her favorite word is "NO" and she says it with conviction. She is officially a rink rat and we are looking forward to trying her out in bob-skates this winter on our backyard ice.

Working for a living

It's two months today that I went back and all is going pretty well. It's definitely a balancing act with three kids but everyone is doing their part to manage the "chaos". Dirk is really enjoying his new job at Hydro and his return to the technical side of engineering.

Looking ahead

The rest of this month and December will be filled with more hockey & ringette. Dane's team is entered in a tourney in Minnesota in a few weeks that should be tons of fun. And of course it's prep time for x-mas ... always a busy, busy time of the year!

Hope life is good - Janie & Dirk

"Where have we been?"

These days I feel like a student with a very overdue assignment. I know I need to get my "work" done but I just haven't been able to get to it. After a couple of weeks of procrastinating I'm giving myself a proverbial kick in the butt tonight and posting our news from the past several weeks.

Since I last wrote Dane has had two monthly chemo treatments. One was mid-September and the other was just this morning. He continues to feel pretty well and his blood counts remain decent. Today's neutrophils are a little lower than usual and not optimal, so we have to return to the clinic in two weeks for a follow-up blood test. The good news is his hemoglobin has rebounded (it was a bit lower in Sept) and is sitting in the middle of the normal range. Bodes well for hockey ... I'll get to that update in a minute. The next week will likely not be ideal - the steroids have been affecting him more in recent months. September was brutal and scary -Dane was really emotional and down. We are hoping it was a "blip" due to all the changes in his life and that this month is better. All of us and his oncology team are anxious for the next seven days to be behind us.

We spent much of September and early October in the rink as Dane and Ashley participated in evaluations for A1 hockey & district (A) ringette. In both their cases, energy = effort = positive results. Ashley was successful in her skates and very pleased her hard work landed her on the district team with her BFF. After a bit of a sluggish start (tryouts began the week of Dane's last chemo treatment), Dane hit his stride and for the second year is playing the highest level of hockey for his age. He is really happy with his coaches and players and is already making new friends. Although it's very hard to go through the process, it's all made worthwhile when you see the kids branch out of their comfort zone and develop new friendships. We were really fortunate last year to meet some great new people and we are looking forward to this year being the same. The next couple of weeks are filled with practices and a couple of tournaments and then league play starts in late October/early November.

My return to work in mid-September went pretty smoothly. I didn't enjoy the first few days and I really, really missed the kids. Having Dirk in the same building was a big help and as much as I thought the car pooling would drive us both crazy, it's actually working out well because we get to catch up to & from work every day. Once I got over my loneliness, I started to shift my mind-set back to the world of Hydro and building dams and I actually began to "enjoy" work. Intuitively I knew it was time because I'd been home for too long with my complete focus the kids and Dane's illness. Of course I still think about it when I'm at the office, but I have a job to do and that requires a different kind of focus. Probably the hardest part of returning was getting over the "nagging" feeling the other shoe would drop if I let my guard down and returned to the world of the "living" as I describe it. I know it isn't logical, but it's how I felt. Now that I've been at it for a month, I'm past that fear and know it's best for everyone that I be employed again. Clare has adjusted really well to her nanny and we are so thankful to have such a kind and warm young woman looking after the kids.

Late September was our time to remember Cole and how his presence, even for such a short time, enhanced our lives. The kids still have their moments when they are sad their older brother is not here, but we remind them his gift to them is to live in the moment and be happy. We know that is what he would wanted for his special siblings.

I will sign-off before my ability to articulate really abandons me. I'm pretty tired tonight - this working for a living is definitely an adjustment!

Until next time, take care - Janie & Dirk

Dragon Boating Finals

The email has arrived ... we finished near the top of the pack after our two races today. We had an awesome day and for the first time in the team's history, clocked two races under 2:00. Based on our results, the following is our time for tomorrow:

Time: 12:40 pm (approximate)

Division: Mixed Recreational, Division I

Heat: AA

Lane: 2

Team: #40 - Paddlestar Gallactica

We will also be speaking at the Closing Ceremonies at 4:00 pm in the Beer Gardens (where else)!It's supposed to be a beautiful day and we'd love it if you could join us as we paddle our hearts out in support of the CCS and celebrate a wonderful group of people's contribution to a great cause.

Thank you and good night. Time to rest some tired bodies!

Janie & Dirk

"September is ..."

This month is significant for many reasons, several of which I'll detail in today's entry - "September is ... "

- Childhood Cancer Awareness Month

All across the world, the message is getting out that September is CCAM. The reading I've done on the Internet is fascinating and makes me realize we are part of such a larger community. One of the neatest things about CCAM is some soul has launched a Facebook campaign to get Oprah to do a show about childhood cancer. It was started just a few days ago and has nearly 5000 members already, me included. Lets hope the message is heard loud and clear.

- Back to ... everything

Tomorrow is day one of structure, oh, I mean school. Ashley and Dane start grades 4 & 5 respectively, officially both in middle school. The backpacks are ready, the outfits picked out and the spirits mixed. Ash is definitely ready ... Dane, well he could wear a bathing suit 12 months of the year! I on the other hand really, really need them to get back to routine - nine weeks of togetherness has us all a bit on edge. Clare is not going to know what's up - she is so used to her big bro & sis being around all the time.

I return to work in a week so another big adjustment for the entire family. Clare's nanny is gearing up to start work and we're hopeful for a smooth transition.

The winter sports have kicked into high gear. Hockey & ringette camps are filling our evenings and weekends, but we love being back at the rink.

- Dragon Boating

We finished our third and final practice last night and it was the toughest one either of us can remember. Wow - we have some sore muscles and butts today. It seems finishing 2nd overall last year has the team thinking we need to improve?!? If you are interested in watching an exciting and emotional event, we are team #40 - Paddlestar Gallactica and our Saturday race times are as follows ...

1st race - Heat W - Lane #1 - Approx time 1:50 pm

2nd race - Heat YY - Lane #2 - Approx time 5:20 pm

We won't know Sunday's final time until later Saturday evening (I will post the final that night).

We are the honorary spokespersons for this year's Festival and will be speaking at the Opening (noon Saturday) & Closing Ceremonies (4:00 pm Sunday). Seems pretty appropriate September is CCAM and this event is taking place this month.

If you'd like to support our fundraising, please see the link I included in my last blog update - Thanks!!!

- The Half-Way Mark

A month or so ago when I couldn't fall asleep one night I did the math in my head re: Dane's treatment. He was diagnosed Jan 6, 2009 and will finish May 8, 2012, a total of 40 months to rid his body hopefully once-and-for-all of this nasty leukemia. Well, it's September 7, 2010 and officially month 20 or the half-way mark of our family's journey. When I figured this all out late that one night it was an overwhelming feeling. Realizing how far we've come since that awful January night is pretty amazing, yet knowing we still have just as much time to go is cause for some angst. We will make it though - Dane is just too tenacious, spirited and downright stubborn to let cancer beat him!!!

Take care - Janie & Dirk